The swine flu's latest victim: my sanity

The swine flu makes you do strange things in the grocery store.  You don't realize you are talking to yourself until you hear your own voice and notice that people are staring at you.

"Will one box of powdered milk be enough?  It only makes 3 quarts, after all.  That's less than a gallon.  How many bowls of cereal will that make?  I guess we could always water down the milk to make it last longer.  Maybe 2 boxes would be better.  But I can't buy TWO boxes, that's crazy.  one box is still within the bounds of sanity.  We always had a box of powdered milk in the house growing up--the emergency box.  It wasn't the emergency box-es, now was it?  Put the other box back."

"Ooooh, the 93% fat-free ground beef is on sale!  Hmmmmm, how many packages should I get?  At least two.  Okay, three.  Three is enough, right?  Maybe I'll get four--No, no, no, that's crazy.  Wait a minute, when the food is running out, you'll kick yourself for not buying that fourth package.  Put it in the cart.  Hey, and the big packages of boneless/skinless chicken breasts are a lot cheaper per ounce than the small packages!  Why didn't I ever notice that before?  Oh right, because I never needed to buy 6 chicken breasts at a time before now.  I'll throw one package in the cart.  Should I get two?  No, that's crazy.  Wait, not it's not--that's only 12 chicken breasts.  How many meals will that make?  I have no idea.  Put it in the cart."

"Seriously, Harris Teeter?  It's a random Wednesday night and you are completely out of Brach's jelly beans?  Seriously?"

"OMG--I have to fit this all in one cart.  I can't get a second cart--I am not a Duggar!!!!  Just a little rearranging, stick the peanut butter under the reusable bags--whew!  Thank goodness those mini cans of baby peas don't take up too much space."